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An intro to news writing (Part 2) — enticing your readers to read on

Posted by Tim Richardson on 10th July 2024

In a previous blog we looked at the structure of a news story and the importance of the inverted triangle. We looked at how you can identify all the important elements of a story — WWWWWH — before combining them into one sentence. This structure is key because it gives you the framework for the ‘story’ — or whatever it is that you’re writing.

It’s also vital because it means you have the raw materials to begin writing. But having the structure — or different elements — in place is only part of the story. Now it’s time to improve the look and feel of our intro to make it more appealing to readers.

When it comes to news writing, the intro is the most important part of the story. Why? Because it presents information in a clear and methodical way. 

As we know, by summing up the story in a sentence or two we can be sure that even if the reader doesn’t read on, at least they leave with the most important information. But we want them to read on. 

The problem is, you only have a few seconds to convince people that your piece of writing is worth reading. To do that — and to help you refine your writing — there are three key things to remember:

  • Use your best words
  • Think of an angle
  • Say it up front

Let’s look at these in a bit more detail.

Use your best words

It goes without saying that word selection is very important. The words you use can lift your text off the page and elevate it to somewhere special. Or, they can leave the reader feeling flat and uninspired. 

One of the best ways to ensure that you use your best words and phrases is to play a simple game of word association.

Whatever you write about, there will be some word associations that could add a little sparkle to your text. For some people, this comes naturally, while for others it’s more of a struggle. No matter. If word association is something that doesn’t come naturally to you, then consider writing a few useful words down before you start to build up some potential vocabulary. 

For instance, in the last blog we heard about The Green Wine Co-Op’s decision to use plastic bottles for its wine.

That prompts me to think of words such as wine, wine bottle, cork, corkscrew, carafe, mulled wine, vintage, Bordeaux, Chardonnay, grapes, sour grapes, off-licence, green, nose, bouquet, connoisseurs, vino, rosé, bottle banks, glass, smashing… 

The company’s decision to reduce its carbon footprint makes me think of words and phrases like green, environmental, eco warrior, eco-friendly, biodegradable… 

By spending a little time creating a personalised set of vocabulary, I can now start to revise my intro. So, instead of:

The Green Wine Co-Op has launched a plastic wine bottle which it claims could help cut its carbon footprint.

We could have:

The Green Wine Co-Op has uncorked a plastic wine bottle which it claims could help cut its carbon footprint.

The Green Wine Co-Op has popped the cork on a plastic wine bottle as part of its plan to cut carbon emissions.

The Green Wine Co-Op has popped the cork on an eco-friendly plastic wine bottle as part of ambitious plans to slash its carbon emissions.

Simply by using more interesting language, the launch of a plastic wine bottle becomes a cork-popping party in celebration of an eco-friendly initiative. How far you decide to use language to lift your text depends on a number of things. 

In essence, though, how far you push this element of creativity depends on your audience, the reason for writing, and what format that writing takes.

Over time, you’ll develop a feel for what’s right and what’s wrong. A set of words that are perfectly acceptable in an ad campaign aimed at young people may not be right to describe a B2B tech product. My personal preference is ‘less is more’. If there’s too much wordplay, the language can get in the way of what you’re trying to say. Ultimately, though, it should be all about your reader. 

So, what’s your angle?

Clearly, being creative with words can help bring some shine to a text, but it’s not the only way to achieve this. 

I’ve trained people who cross their arms and tell me in no uncertain terms that the use of creative language is not for them. Their approach to writing, they tell me, is more factual. They are uncomfortable using a palate of more colourful language. 

But this is not a problem. Being creative isn’t just about using flowery language. You can be equally creative by getting the right angle. Or, in other words, by approaching a story from a different perspective, you can also make a reader sit up and take notice.

For instance, instead of:

The Green Wine Co-Op has popped the cork on an eco-friendly plastic wine bottle as part of ambitious plans to slash its carbon emissions.

You could change the angle of the story so that it is written from the wine drinkers’ perspective:

Wine drinkers can now do their bit for the environment after The Green Wine Co-Op launched a new plastic wine bottle.

or:

Wine drinkers are being assured that the taste of their favourite wine will not be affected following The Green Wine Co-Op’s decision to use recyclable plastic bottles instead of glass.

Add in a little word flair and you could get this:

Chardonnay-sipping wine drinkers can now do their bit for the environment after The Green Wine Co-Op launched a new eco-friendly plastic wine bottle.

Wine connoisseurs are being assured that the taste of their favourite Merlot will not be affected following The Green Wine Co-Op’s decision to use recyclable plastic bottles instead of glass.

Playing with angles is all about creative thinking — not creative words. For instance, what about toying with a different environmental angle that has yet to be highlighted?

The ancient cork-producing oak forests of Sardinia could be under threat after The Green Wine Co-Op became the latest supermarket to ditch traditional glass wine bottles in favour of recyclable plastic containers.

Cork from Sardinian oak trees is famed for its use in wine bottles. But with the advent of plastic bottles, there are fears cork farmers could be put out of business and the forests lost forever.

Some might describe this as coming from left field or ‘thinking outside of the box’. To me, it’s simply what is possible once you understand the role that different angles can play. It’s not a ‘gift’ or down to the fact that someone is ‘good with words’. It’s about a thought process that once you understand some of the rules, you can explore and exploit.

Say it up front

That’s the easy part. By using the inverted triangle or pyramid, you automatically say the most important things first.

Tim Richardson